Do You Want a Divorce to Escape Your In-laws?

Those jokes about horrible mothers-in-law are not very funny when they’re true! If you’ve discovered that your real-life in-laws are not making you laugh, you are not alone. Three out of four couples report having some level of problems with their in-laws! Whether it’s your spouse’s parents or their siblings, there’s no question as to the impact in-laws can have on a marriage—and it can be very good, or very, very bad.

Research Conclusions

While it’s true that many in-laws are a source of unconditional support and love, there are certainly plenty of couples who find that in-laws are the greatest source of conflict in their marriage. Discordant relationships—or relationships that are viewed as attractive by one partner and problematic by the other—can and do lead to divorce—and studies show that this is particularly true when it’s the wife’s family that is causing difficulties. In fact, when couples lack a consensus on in-laws, research concludes that  greater levels of friction exist than with other types of disagreement in a marriage.

A Source of Conflict

There are countless problems that can arise linked to in-laws.  Some of the most common include:

1. When in-laws know all of your business and criticize, disrespect your decisions and goals, and indicate their displeasure with the way you handle things;
2. When one spouse relies on their family to a degree that vexes the other spouse, whether that dependence is emotional, financial, or otherwise;
3. When couples are not on the same page when it comes to establishing boundaries;
4. When one spouse declines reprimand misbehaving family members and expects their spouse to go along to get along;
5. When one or both spouses share details of private marital issues, especially when it puts their spouse in a bad light;
6. When a spouse consistently sides with their family over their spouse in times of conflict.

Each of these problems can display in many ways, but the upshot is the same: feelings of betrayal, separation, and desertion.

Bigger Issues Make Couples Susceptible to Discord 

It’s important for partners in a marriage to have a certain degree of interdependence in their relationship, and for them to prioritize themselves as both individuals and as a team. Short of that, external factors will always have the potential to divide and conquer any relationship. While in-laws can cause disruptions, couples who are vulnerable to such disturbances typically have additional rudimentary problems in their relationship. Specifically, such couples may have difficulty recognizing themselves as a unit, or communicating their feelings and expectations. There may be general insecurities about the strength of the marriage, as well.

For Whatever Reason, it’s just not Working

Whether your in-laws are the problem or just the symptom that showed you that your marriage is in trouble, if you’re ready to divorce, the experienced Boca Raton divorce attorneys at WiseLieberman can help. We always endeavor to achieve the best possible outcomes for you. To discuss, schedule a confidential consultation in our Boca Raton office today.

Source:

bbc.com/worklife/article/20221111-the-tensions-that-fan-tricky-in-law-relationships