Is It Time To Give Up On Your Marriage?
Marriage is not always easy. Ask anyone who’s been married for a year or more, and they can testify to the fact that sometimes it’s doggone brutal! Marriage has ups and downs, for sure, but the downs can be excruciating. Even so, many couples endure these slumps, knowing that it’s just a momentary bump in the road. But when is it just phantastic thinking to suppose that things are going to get better?
When it May be Time to Move On
There are often indicators that what you’re experiencing in your marriage is not just a phase; it’s a shattered marriage. If you’ve been contemplating divorce, these may be the signs that the time is right:
- Your spouse is abusive: If you have been subjected to abuse of any kind– financial, emotional, physical, mental, and/or sexual, understand that you are being victimized, and you deserve better. But better days are not on the horizon without substantial interventions, and are instead likely to worsen over time. Now, more than ever, you need to put yourself—and your kids—first. Divorce may be your best option.
- You and your partner are not equally committed to the marriage: Are you always the one trying to figure out how to make things work? Do you find yourself offering to compromise with no reciprocation? If communication is a dead-end, you may be fighting a losing battle. You can’t save a failing marriage on your own—it’s just not a one-man job. You may be better off on your own if your partner isn’t going to join in the relationship rehab.
- You’re on the lookout for someone better: You are clearly unhappy in your marriage but can’t quite get the divorce proceedings started. Your spouse is simply uninspiring, and you find yourself eyeballing other possibilities in terms of a new model. In this situation, it’s you who is not willing to do the work to resuscitate your marriage, so do everyone a favor and just get that divorce.
- You don’t trust your spouse, and probably never will: Everyone makes mistakes, and plenty of couples succeed at putting those mistakes in the past, sometimes even growing stronger because of them. But when one spouse suffers from persistent issues with problems like infidelity, addiction, or violence, understand that entrenched issues are feeding those behaviors. Can things improve without major work? Yes, but the chances are pretty scant. If the two of you are not up for the work, it may be time to consider a fresh start.
- You’ve sought advice repeatedly: It sounds like you want to leave your marriage, but want permission from—friends?– Family?—the Internet?—in order to move forward.. But truly, no one else can tell you when the time is right. You basically have to rely on your own experience and knowledge about the situation, and call a knowledgeable, local divorce attorney to get the ball rolling.
When the Decision is Made
If you’re ready, the committed Boca Raton divorce attorneys at WiseLieberman are prepared to work toward your goals as you progress through the divorce process. To discuss your situation, schedule a confidential consultation in our Boca Raton office today.