What Women Need to Know When Getting Divorced

Let’s face it: divorce is tough.  It is a strain emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially.  But with a little planning and with some realistic expectations, women—particularly those with children—can get through to the other side with minimal stress. Here are some general rules of the road that can help:

• Be Kind: Don’t beat yourself up because your marriage failed.  It happens.  Now it’s time to pick up the pieces and move forward.  By the same token, there’s no point in loading up the blame and guilt on your spouse.  Kindness all around will benefit everyone involved.
• Put Some Money Together: Whether your spouse has had virtually exclusive control of the finances or you’ve been the family money manager, you need to prepare to handle things for & by yourself for a while.  Be sure to set money aside whenever you can. Take a look at the value in your home, investments, and retirement plans.  They will all be important down the road.
• Hire a Competent Local Divorce Attorney: You need to trust this person, so take the time to find one who will listen to your goals and work to achieve best outcomes.
• Create a “Divorce Calendar:” You’ll want to document conversations and interactions with your spouse, not to mention keep track of any meetings with your attorney. Your lawyer will likely ask you to gather documents and so forth, so the calendar is a good place to track your progress with such tasks.  Additionally, you’ll need to make notations related to child visitation, missed visits, and both your and your spouse’s efforts to interact with your kids’ teachers, doctors, coaches, and the like.
• Keep Documents Organized: It’s a good idea to have chronological documentation of events, bills, payments, drafts, pleadings, and so forth. Ultimately you will need to keep the final divorce decree (it will be necessary if you change your name legally) and child care arrangements (essential for international travel or in the event there are problems down the road with the family planning agreement.)
• Nix the Social Media: It’s entirely possible that your spouse will try to use anything and everything against you during divorce negotiations.  Don’t provide an easy target on Facebook, Instagram, or other social media pages.
• Try to Create a New Routine that Works for You: With things feeling upside down, one of the best things you can do for yourself (and for your kids) is to create a routine that everyone can rely on.  It will give you a sense of stability despite the turmoil of change.
• Stay Positive: There are plenty of divorcing couples who spend countless hours trying to undermine and argue with one another.  Don’t be one of them.  If your spouse tries to entice you into a battle, don’t take the bait.  Particularly if you have children, you’re going to be in one another’s lives for a while to come. Don’t burn bridges.
• Plan for Tomorrow: Take steps to secure your future:  Where will you live? How will you support yourself and your family? Will there be childcare issues that need to be addressed? How will you support your children during the changes in their lives?

Are You Ready? 

If the time is right, say good-bye to your marriage with the assistance of the efficient and effective Boca Raton divorce attorneys at WiseLieberman.  Schedule a confidential consultation in our office today.