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Holidays After Divorce


Like many families, yours established some solid traditions around the holidays.  Now that you’re divorced, you’re no longer a part of those traditions, making the holidays tough.  Whether it’s the winter holidays, birthdays, Independence Day or some other special day, it’s tough to give up the rituals that were once so central to the time. How can you possibly reinvent holidays without the customs that were so embedded in your life prior to the split? While it may not be easy, it is possible.

Accepting the Changes 

For starters, you need to recognize that things are going to be different, for your own sake and the sake of your children.  And while change is never easy, understand that yours is just one of over 700,000 marriages that ended in divorce this year.  Transitioning into new patterns is something many families adapt to all the time.  You can, too.  How to get started?  How about with an honest conversation with the kids.  Ask them if there’s anything they’d like to do to celebrate this year.  Are there any places they’d like to go or things they’d like to see and do? Have the conversation early enough that you can schedule events around your allotted time with them.

What Can you Do with the Kids? 

Remember: an event does not have to be expensive or lavish in order to be memorable.  Making cocoa together can be unforgettable when the time is filled with love and joy. Have the children help you pick out a tree and decorate your home; sing carols together; go see holiday lights.  Or start something totally different that has nothing to do with the holidays, but that can become a new part of your holiday fun:  go swimming, have a midnight picnic in your living room, or eat a new kind of food.  It’s up to you to establish new and fun activities that unite and bring on the smiles.

When You’re not with the Kids 

What about the times you are on your own?  It could be easy to get stuck in the dumps, yearning for days gone by.  But that’s not helpful for anyone.  Instead, consider these suggestions:

  • Take the time to connect with other family and friends;
  • Get involved in charitable work to bring joy to others;
  • Go do something enjoyable on your own;
  • Consider a mini vacation;
  • Connect with the kids via Zoom or Facetime if possible.

You’ll Get Through it 

Change can be hard, but establishing new traditions can be invigorating and meaningful.  At WiseLieberman, we wish you happiness this holiday, and every day.  Should you find yourself looking for legal help, contact our Boca Raton family attorneys for a confidential consultation.



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