Author Archives: Jay Butchko
If Tragedy Puts Your Marriage on the Rocks
Couples who endure severe stress due to tragedy often struggle to stay grounded and connected. Whether it’s a natural disaster that destroys everything you own, having your child die in a horrible accident, or getting diagnosed with a life-altering illness, you and your spouse may be wrestling with feelings of anger, depression, guilt, and… Read More »
When You Can’t Afford a Divorce
Is your marriage becoming unbearably boring? Or maybe you are totally turned off by your spouse? Have things become violent, or do you fear for your safety and for the safety of your children? Whatever your situation, nothing is more exasperating than wanting to get out of a marriage and being unable to see… Read More »
The Four Horsemen of Divorce
Since about forty percent of marriages in America end in divorce, many are looking for the “magic bullet” that leads to a successful marriage. Two such researchers, Dr. Julie Gottman and her husband Dr. John Gottman, together founded the Gottman Institute to explore the issue. Their combined experience as psychologist/marriage researcher/therapist/led them to formulate… Read More »
Dealing with Sneaky Divorce Strategies
For anyone involved in a divorce from a partner who is angry and vindictive, there may be some ugly tactics ahead that could definitely make the coming weeks and months (hopefully not years) dismal. There are several crummy things that they could try in order to drag out the process and wear you down…. Read More »
When You Want a Quick Divorce
For anyone looking for a quick and simple divorce, you may be pleased to know that the process can be fairly swift under certain circumstances. Typically a divorce can range anywhere from a few months to a few years. What can you do to speed up the process? Uncontested Divorces Move More Quickly Obviously,… Read More »
Making the Announcement to Adult Children: You’re Getting Divorced
Are you wondering how to break the news to your adult children that you are getting divorced? It shouldn’t be too tough, right? They are adults, after all. Nonetheless, the fact is that many adults absolutely cannot comprehend the idea that their parents are splitting up! After being a constant for their whole lives—change… Read More »
Women Can Share the “Mental Load” of Co-Parenting After Divorce
It was only about 50 years ago that eighty percent of divorces led to moms having full-custody and dads scraping by with some weekends and holidays, while, of course, providing child support in the way of money to their ex-wives. But these days we’ve come to recognize that children need their dads, and not… Read More »
You Can Evade the Poor Health Impacts Associated with Divorce
The link between divorce and poor health outcomes has been reliably documented over the years through countless studies. Social scientists have discovered that there is a more than 20 percent higher mortality rate for people who’ve experienced divorce than for those who are still married. Clearly divorce can have a negative effect on the… Read More »
Have You Considered a Divorce Coach or a Doula?
Anyone who’s been divorced can attest to the fact that divorce can be one of the most nerve-wracking events in life. It consumes your time, money, and all kinds of patience., There are 101 hazardous bridges you’ll have to cross: Who gets to keep the family dog? What about the artwork that you cherish,… Read More »
Smooth Transitions in Shared Custody Arrangements
If it’s confusing and frustrating for everyone when kids go from one parent to another, you should know that the back-and-forth can be a lot easier. How can parents make the transition less like a ball bouncing from house to house and more like a smooth, simple part of life that is drama-free for… Read More »
